in the labyrinth

this summer has been a season of transition for me and my little family.  we uprooted our lives from los angeles and trekked to the opposite corner of the country, settling into the bangor, maine area.  our new roots are still finding their way into the earth, and so much has changed since we left los angeles.

naviyah has grown from a 4 month old baby into a 7 month old baby.  she has four beautiful teeth and she loves to smile all of the time, so one can often capture a glimpse!  she has the sweetest laugh, and it comes easily.  such a blessing to hear her laugh.  she crawls and loves to be upside down on her head while standing in downward dog.  yes, she is a natural yogi.

moving is stressful any time of life.  it's a hard act to accomplish.  and moving with a small growing teething baby is also no doubt, very challenging.  there was the whole month of june, where our planet also met three eclipses, and honestly i didn't know how much longer i could hold onto my sanity.

now that we have most of our lives unpacked, and we are tuned into the maine rhythm, i feel as if i am coming into my own.  a new identity is taking hold.  an identity where i can call myself a mother, and also merge those bits of myself that took center stage before i was a mother.  this whole process makes me think back to birthing from within, and the labyrinth we find ourselves in as new parents.  once we give birth, we are just at the center, the heart of the labyrinth.  but we must find our way out of the labyrinth to make our full return to the world, or society.

my labyrinth just happens to have a few extra layers to it, adding in a move, which entails a whole new community.

although i am beginning to claim my new identity and beginning to come out of the labyrinth, i can feel there is still much work to be done before i know who this new i is.  this is about process. . .and there is nothing to rush.  the pleasure in all of this is holding space for what is. . .the beautiful ever changing moments with my daughter as she grows and develops.  as she vocalizes with sounds and laughter, as her eyes light up when we connect, as she grasps my breast while she feeds, as she flickers smiles in her sleep and as she bursts into tears to gain my attention.

i am lost in my labyrinth and i know exactly where i am.  i am here.

No comments:

Post a Comment